Ever wondered why it is so hard to accept and love ourselves? For some of us, we can choose to see beyond the flaws of other people and accept them for who they are, but it is a struggle to do the same for ourselves.
For some of us, it is even hard to accept compliments. Someone tells you how beautiful you are, and your reply is something like this “I am really not that fine though..see, see how weird my dentition is” (this right here, is me). We like to point out all the weird things we think is wrong with us, but the other person is not even seeing what we are complaining about. At times, what you are complaining about, is what someone likes about you.
I struggled with self-acceptance and self-love. I couldn’t bear to look at myself in the mirror for more than one minute. When I looked at the mirror, I saw everything wrong with me, I hardly saw the things that were right and beautiful. I remember finding it hard to smile because I felt my dentition was terrible. One day, during my internship, someone walked up to me and said, “you have a beautiful smile”. Of course, I was shocked. The next morning, I spent some time looking at my smile and realized that it was actually a beautiful smile (no pride here, I promise you), from then, I started spending more than with the mirror. I started facing my fears, literally. I had to accept who I was. The things I felt were wrong with me, I had to accept them. It was until I did, that I moved forward.
When people look at us, they look at the features that are visible. They look at the characteristics we portray when we are with them, and with that, they love and accept us. But, when we look at ourselves, we look at the pains we have gone through, the hurt, the rejection; and in the end, finding it hard to accept and love ourselves fully.
Will you still have bad memories of yourself?, of the terrible things you did? Of the way people treated you, even family? Very possible. But should it stop you from accepting and loving who you are now? No. should it stop you from striving to be a better person? Not at all.
You are BEAUTIFUL/HANDSOME
You are SMART
You are STRONG
You are CAPABLE
You are UNIQUE
Acceptance starts from within. Don’t wait for the world to accept you. Love and accept yourself and with time, you will realize that you don’t need their verdict (the truth is, you never did). Is this a one-day change? Nope. But if you keep at it, you will make it.
It is time to Love and Accept yourself. Make that decision today!